Archive for the ‘pursuit of happiness’ Category

What I Have Written, I Have Written

October 9, 2010

I can say to my BB a dozen times, “I love you” but it seems to have more meaning to her when I write it down just once.  Whether on a card, a note, or a letter, the sentiments I vocalize many times a day pale in significance to the scrawl of my hand.  Those very words, I love you… etched in that moment of time are held like an official document or a piece of evidence that makes the hearing of it circumstantial but the tangible proof more credible somehow.  The written word is more eloquent and she never tires of reading it.

Which brings me here, to the writings of my blog and the past four years of sporadic entry.  Many things have changed since May 2006 and the whimsy that placed me at the keyboard in the first place.  I re-married.  I re-located.  I re-considered my politics.  Through all of those months and thousands of words stretched into 400 entries here at AMRFP, I learned something about myself.  She reminds me of it every day… 

But there is more to it than that.  Do the entries I have posted stand the test of time?  Did I think or say something here that proved false?  Were my convictions misplaced?  Are there inaccuracies here that have somehow misled?

Hmmm… think back. http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/05/27/in-the-begining/

I  still love that song…

and I still believe that original, first post of May 2006 and with each entry I tried to remain true to that theme of Advantages of Mutual Respect and Fair Play because I truly believe that is what the world needs and if you live it, it will come back to you. 

Or perhaps, out live you…

http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/06/22/9/

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2010/10/09/earlyshow/saturday/main6942465.shtml

I know that some bloggers use this tool as a bully pulpit and I tried not to do that, but sometimes it was just unavoidable…

http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/07/22/blinded-by-foresight/

Oh, I’ll admit that I have had my share of theories, but I don’t think they were all that far-fetched, considering the subject matter.http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/08/26/the-rock-and-roll-conspiracy/  And you must agree with me to a certain point, because this topic remains one that still receives a multitude of hits.

 

Wow.  Wild Thing I think you move me…

Anyway, for what purpose was AMRFP started and why should it continue?  I mean, hasn’t it all been said? many times over? by someone more capable and profound than myself? http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/09/28/life-begins-at-wd40/

and it is lovely to see you each and every time.  Walk along with me to the next bend.  But when and where does the next bend lay (or lie?)  And what was AMRFP originally?  A celebration of truth, justice, freedom of speech, mom’s apple pie, Jesse Winchester and the lifestyle of a free radical thinker (don’t tell your mother, she knows)

So maybe that is what this blog needs, to get back on track.  Perhaps its original destination has detoured a bit, http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/10/13/irrefutably-44th-avenue-south/ but it’s intentions were good.

 https://lifemadedelicious.ca/en/Recipes/P/Perfect_Apple_Pie.aspx?&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=Apple%20Pie%20Recipe&utm_content=164731333&utm_campaign=.Pies

Honest.  Sometimes I just needed something to lift me from the doldrums and a random piece just tumbled out, http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/11/14/53-studebaker-goin-for-broke/  which in turn led to some interest by you, the reader.  It was all quite fun and not to be taken too seriously.  But then, what happened?

http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2006/12/05/sacred-words-sung-to-beatles-music/

I guess I got a little cynical… is that a bad thing?

I remind myself of the Bible’s description of the betrayal of Jesus found in the book of John.  You remember, how Jesus was left by his disciples and condemned by the religious leaders of the day?  They were supposed to be on the watch for the Son of Man but gave in to their own interpretations of what he should be.  And when Jesus clearly did not recognize the religious leader’s hierarchy, they gave him over to the authorities to be put to death as a fraud.  While Pilate could find nothing wrong with the man, as a king Jesus was a threat to Caesar and Pilate had to act.  He washed his hands of the matter and sent Jesus off to be impaled, placing a sign over his stake in Hebrew, Latin and Greek that read: Jesus the Nazarene – The King of the Jews.   Of course, the priests and rabbis took immediate offense at this and declared, ” Do not write ‘the King of the Jews’ but that he said, ‘I am the King of the Jews.’ “  After which Pilate famously declared, “What I have written, I have written.”  John 19:22

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/39397251/ns/us_news-life?gt1=43001

I have tried to stay neutral on some subjects, but it has been difficult.  Sometimes you just gotta let it ride…

So, starting with post 401 and from this day forward I will try to remain true to what I originally set out to do with this blog.  There have been many fringe benefits along the way.  There have been some repercussions, too.  I will make every effort to place as a priority mutual respect and fair play.

After all, isn’t that what we all want?

Peace.

Ray LaMontagne on the brain

September 21, 2010

http://www.raylamontagne.com/us/home

My BB and I recently went and saw Ray in concert at the Molsen Amphitheater in Toronto:

An excellent song, Ray quiets a crowd like Jesse Winchester…

If you haven’t heard his new CD you should check it out:

You won’t regret it.

peace.

money “grows” on trees

September 21, 2010

http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/filmmaker-fills-tree-with-money-for-social-experiment/20nc5q6t?rs=tree&from=en-us_msnhp&form=msnhed&gt1=42007

I found this interesting. 

I guess most of us are so used to gimmicks or gags that seeing money offered for the taking becomes suspect.  Kind of like the lottery.  People become really interested when the jackpot hits 100 million dollars.  As if 80 or 90 million is small change…

Now if on this money tree they’d been 100′s…

I wonder what would have happened then.

http://www.whoisamy.com/

peace.

Social Insecurity (or How I Stopped Worrying and Love Being Less Self-Assured)

September 17, 2010

I guess it is no big news that the economy is in the crapper.  Just look at me, home on a work day.  Oh, it’s nobody’s fault, really.  Sometimes things just work out that way when you work construction.  You either have too much work or not enough.  It’s hard having it come in just as you need it.

I’ve reached an age where I can just about picture myself retiring.  Now that’s scary.  Because when you think about it, no one is conscientiously  going to grow old, are they?  We all are going to go on and on until we reach middle age, somewhere way in the future.  But grow old?  Never!

So imagine my disheartenment when I read this on the Internet yesterday…

http://frugalzeitgeist.com/how-long-will-social-security-last/

I know how to fix social security.  It is very simple.  End it.  Baby boomers born between 1946 and 1964 still get it.  The rest forge ahead with a new program.  It will be called Social Assurance.  Families that take care of their own will benefit the greatest.  They will see reduced taxes if not eliminated all together.  Oh, there will be other means for the government to collect taxes, don’t worry about that.  But these families will not pay taxes on their wages.  Imagine that.  Keeping Grandma might be a better financial arrangement than shipping her to an old folks home. 

Medication and health care for those over 65?  Free.  F-R-E-E.  How can we afford this?  Simple.  Health care will become non-profit.  It seems a crime to me to make money on someone else’s illness.  Doesn’t that seem to be a conflict of interest?  If you make them well, they no longer need your services.  So just keep them coming back, stretch it out.  Suck them dry.  Nope, not anymore. 

In 2009 America’s #1 export was military equipment.  Our #2 export was pharmaceuticals.  If we don’t kill them we strive to make them well.  Remove the profiteers from these two “commodities” and we might be able to do away with a lot of things.

Did you know that there are a record number of Americans living in poverty?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/39211644/ns/us_news-life

This is happening while we claim to have a better way for the world.  Democracy.  This despite a 12 trillion dollar annual Gross National Product. http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_2008_US_GNP  So how do we reverse the trend of more  people living in poverty?   Simple.  Stop giving jobs away.  We were at our greatest when we took care of ourselves first.  The Bible says, “Remove the rafter from your own eye, then you can better see how to remove the splinter from your brothers eye.”  Luke 6:42  If we don’t work, we don’t make money.

Did you know illegal substance abuse is higher now? 

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/39200536/ns/health-addictions/?GT1=43001

I guess it is because of the pressure of day-to-day living.  People need to escape.  Alcohol consumption is up, too.    Here’s a thought.  Decriminalize marijuana.  

I’m not saying everyone should smoke a fatty.  Everyone shouldn’t.  I don’t.  But you know, we spend billions on the war against drugs, why not divert our attention to national security instead?  We have not gained anything in making pot illegal, except making our citizens criminals.  More people die because of alcohol related abuse than any other single cause.  Think about it.  Crimes of violence.  Automobile deaths.  Health related deaths.  Work related injuries and deaths.  Throw tobacco in there and the cost is staggering.  Nobody ever knocked over a convenience store because they were high on pot.  

I say educate the public and let them decide.  You can legally brew your own beer, why not grow your own pot?  Curtail the selling of marijuana, yes.  Sell it as you do tobacco and alcohol, yes.  And of course, tax it.  Limit it’s use as we already limit alcohol and tobacco.  I don’t think we would become a nation of pot-heads.  Millions have tried it and left it behind.  Some have used it all their lives and functioned normally.  We can’t predict how society will respond, so why are we trying to protect us from ourselves, especially when it is an unpopular and costly effort that has not garnished any positive gains?  The definition of insanity?  Trying the same solution to a problem and expecting different results.  We need a broader mind, not a closed one.

And another thing.  This insurance business.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/39215770/ns/health-health_care/?GT1=43001

It comes down to profit again.  I don’t think the U.S. government should be in the insurance business.  In fact, I don’t think anybody should.  If it is broken, lets fix it.  If you are sick, let’s make you better.  If you have lost it, let’s replace it.  It is that simple. 

Our society should operate like a family.  We take care of our own.  There is no enrichment at another’s expense, there is no profiting off another’s calamity.  The old ways are gone.

Okay.  How are we going to PAY for all this progress?  Simple.

Social Assurance means faith in ourselves.  That we will be treated honestly and fairly.  That we will be cared for and looked out after.  This is a pact we make unto ourselves, this is a creed we will live by that as long as we are treated fairly, we will treat others the same way.  There is no greed because of an un-certain future.  There is no theft for lack of necessity.  There is no animosity or suspicion of motive.

What do we all want?  To live and let live.  To go our way, to be clothed and fed and sheltered from the elements.  To see our loved ones prosper, not just financially but morally, physically and spiritually.

Social Assurance means trust in each other.

Most dreams seem far-fetched… but the reality is, our set course is not our desired destination.

peace.

backyard miracle/discovery?

August 22, 2010

“Nothing ever happens  here!”  Do you sometimes feel that way?  Believe it or not, miracles do happen… they may take place in our own backyard.  Take this story for example…  (sent to me by an alert and faithful reader!)

http://news.sympatico.ctv.ca/home/old_sudbury_mine_the_site_of_search_for_dark_matter/0ff98095

Recently (1-16-2010) I wrote a piece entitled Dark Matter of a Light Nudge Theory. http://advantagesofmutualrespectandfairplay.com/2010/01/16/dark-matter-of-a-light-nudge-theory/  In it I compared the dark matter of the universe to the dark matter found in the human brain. 

http://discovermagazine.com/2009/sep/19-dark-matter-of-the-human-brain

http://www.unexplained-mysteries.com/column.php?id=173727

Is it possible that we are all inter-connected by some massive divine spider web?

I’m not a real religious person, though I have had my moments, but could this discovery coincide with the Bible passage at Psalms 8:4?

When the Bible says God keeps us in mind, does it mean that we are literally in His mind?  And if that is a possible reality, could God simply change His mind if what we are doing doesn’t suit Him?

We go along thinking that what we do doesn’t matter.  People tell us that things just happen, there is no creative process in the design of the human race.  But when we have an idea, isn’t that a creative spark?  Couldn’t there be a supreme being whose creative thought patterns spawned life as we know it?

It makes you wonder…

 

Space?  or the space between His ears…  and ours?

.

peace

a little sad today

August 14, 2010

It has been overcast all morning long. I’ve been watching the neighbors across the street packing up to move. I feel badly because I have lived here a full year and I never got around to crossing the street to introduce myself.  I tell myself that he could have very easily crossed over to have met me (and since he was here when I arrived that would have been the neighborly thing to do) but now it is just one of those things.

My neighbor across the street has a wife and children.  As they load up their belongings I have seen what appears to be family and friends show up to help.  Moving is such a hassle.  And here it is just three weeks before school starts again.  I wonder what his family was like.  I’ve seen the kids out playing in the yard.  Seen his wife come home with the groceries.  I’ve even said “good morning” to him or “How’s it going?” as we each have left for our respective jobs, but I don’t even know his name.

It seems odd to me that they’d be moving in the middle of the month.  It couldn’t be because the rent was past due because that usually qualifies as a “midnight move-out”, slipping away with a frantic blitz of activity to avoid being detected by the landlord.  I know a lot about that.  When I was a kid my step-father frequently drank up his paycheck to the point that there was no food in the house and we couldn’t pay the bills.  I never knew from one day to the next whether we’d be at a certain local long enough to call a place ”home”.   Nope.  My neighbor’s move is being done in broad daylight.

Maybe he got a promotion and has decided he wants better digs.  He could be one of those people who has won the lottery and is trying to remain low key until he relocates.  Maybe his wife’s mother is sick and they decided to move closer in order to be there for her during her time of need.  Perhaps the children have reached the age where each requires his own room and they just need a bigger place.  It is sitting here fabricating these different scenarios that has put me in the doldrums.

Even my BB has felt this way as she confides in me.  “I feel like going over and wishing them well, but I wasn’t sure how to go about doing it.”  I agreed with her.  “Yeah, it might come across like you’re glad to see them go.”  “Yes,” she says, “so sad.”  But now I reason within myself, why do we feel sad?  Maybe this move is a good thing for them.

But in reality I think I know the reason and it pains me to have to admit it.  Even with my lack of direct participation I have placed myself in line with the rest of the neighborhood’s residents.  Because I have tried to be friendly towards those on the left and right of our rented house and been met with indifference.  This is not a friendly neighborhood.  Perhaps if I had crossed the street I could have made it seem a little more so, but I waited for someone else to approach me first.  Those I have made the effort with have made it seem bothersome, like I had an ulterior motive.  As if the next time I showed up I would ask them to borrow their lawnmower or a cup of sugar or something equally invasive and annoying.  So I shrank back, too.  I turned inward.

I’ll be sorry to see my neighbor leave.  I imagine as I see their mini-van’s tailights disappear down the street and around the corner for the last time I will still ponder about where they’ll end up.  I see this as a lost potential.  Somehow deep inside I grieve a bit.  I picture myself seeing them somewhere in the future, like at the supermarket or down at the park.  Should I go up and introduce myself then?  “Hi, I’m the guy who lived across the street from you before you moved.  Sorry I didn’t catch your name before?”  No.  I wouldn’t do that.  Maybe I’d just say “good morning” or “How’s it going?”

I wouldn’t want to appear un-friendly.

 peace.

Sometimes I sits and think…

August 1, 2010

I have been reading a most excellent book, girls on the edge by Leonard Sax.  I am about halfway through it now and it has been very informative.   http://leonardsax.com/

I’ll admit that I probably was not the greatest parent, though I did the best I could with my limited knowledge and ability.  This second time around with my BB and her children I feel I would like to do better, but here’s the rub…

Kids will still be kids and parents (including step-parents) have the cards stacked against them.  It is a difficult task being a friend/mentor/counselor/guardian/disciplinarian/confidant in a world that portrays us as less than intelligent.  If you find this is true in your case, try a copy of one of Dr. Sax’s books. 

I highly recommend him. 

peace.

Somewhere O’er the Volcano

August 1, 2010

http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/amazing-scene-captured-over-volcano/2045skcn?from=en-us_msnhp&GT1=42007

How little we know…

peace.

What You Need…

July 17, 2010

Surprise!  Your momma was right!  Better eat your vegetables… ?gt1=43001  but oops!  somebody forgot to put the nutrients in!

Doesn’t that just beat all?  The good ol’ days were really good…

and good for us, too.  Seems like today we just are not getting what we need.

So this morning as I contemplate my second cup of tea, I wonder about what other things were better for us when we should have eaten our veggies…

1)  Music was better.  But don’t take my word for it, ask the recording industry.  Record sales have plummeted  recently and plug my ears with nostalgia but I gotta think it has to do with content.  Better music means more satisfied ears.  I keep telling RIAA executives this, but they don’t listen.  They are not giving us what we need.

2)  Automobiles were more interesting and friendlier, too.  It used to be you could tell a Ford from a Chevy at a glance.  Cars seemed to be made stronger, too.  I remember jumping up and down on the hood of our car when I was a kid and nobody thought a thing of it.  Backing into another car meant merely a “kiss” of the bumpers, you could lay down in the back seat and the trunk was large enough to rival a wading pool.  In fact, I think we filled ours on occasionally hot summer days in order to cool off.

  Simple transportation is what we need.

3)  Fashion.  Well, fashion is a funny thing.  Get some fool to wear a visor backwards and upside down then the world follows like he’s the Pied Piper of Hamelin.

One artist claims another is a copycat whilst archive footage reveals THAT artist ripping off another previous to her.

lady-gaga-gets-a-dventurously-intimate-wrassles-with-madonna-on-snl-1.html

 I use the term artist loosely… (see #1 above)

But fashion is one of those things that never go out of style.  Old is new and vintage is hip.  I remember when you had to wear out your jeans in order to have them faded, ripped and thread bare… now you can buy them that way.  It is almost as if fashion can’t wait.  I saw some knee-high lace up boots advertised for fall this morning, ugh! can you imagine? 

 The things we do to look good but is it really what we need?

4)  Money.  Remember when money was really something?  I mean, win a million dollars and you were set for life.

Millionaire-pets.aspx?cp-documentid=24877154&imageindex=1&cp-searchtext=richest%20pets

Nowadays millions are not enough.  8lotteryWinnersWhoLostTheirMillions.aspx  Money can tear families apart.108590 or turn friends into enemies. crime  Still you gotta think, what’s wrong with money?

A devalued currency in the U.S. has made the Canadian dollar stronger while China blossoms into a financial juggernaut.  Remember the good ol’ days when our greenbacks were backed by gold and silver?  Substantial backing meant strong consumer confidence.  This Federal Reserve note business is a jinx.  It does not give us what we need. 

5)  Health.  There is an old saying that “health is wealth” and the key to happiness is longevity but it seems we are less healthy now than any time in our history.  Though our average life span has risen substantially, health issues are a multi-billion dollar industry. 

Some people blame the food we eat.  So are we living longer, unhealthier lives?  See the advertisements on T.V.?  Ask your doctor then get a second opinion?  Can we really buy better health? ?Do-We-Really-Need-to-Take-Vitamins-for-Our-Health?&id=1066888  Seems like a ”pair of docs” to me. articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100260381>1=31036 

6)  Politics.  Do we all agree that our political system sucks? (see the post, un-American activities )  I have advocated a strong 3rd party on this blog for a while now. (see the post, Have a little cake with your Tea Party? )  I think it is past due.  When our society has to choose between the “best of the worst” it is no wonder that people get fed up.  Our political system has sunk into such a quagmire that our faith in our politicians has been shaken down to the roots.  Are we doomed to be lost in a vacuum that continues to draw out the worst in us?  When citizens view their representatives with contempt, that form of government is clearly not giving them what they need.

7)  Religion.  They say two things you cannot discuss with people are politics and religion.  I think that is wrong.  Politics and religion are the bond that holds a society together.  When either falter, the people suffer.  We can have our own views, ideas, beliefs and faith as long as they don’t interfere with the rights of another having their freedom of choice in kind.  You may have your moral convictions, but others have the same path they must travel to come by those beliefs.  If there is a God, we should all try to immolate His qualities of Love, Patience and Tolerance.  Because, as the Bible says, if God looked for perfection, who of us could stand before Him? (see the post, Does God Hate Haiti? )  If a religion divides us, that congregation does not have the teachings that we need.

So what is it that we really need besides better vegetables?

 

Maybe we need to laugh more and not take ourselves too seriously.  Let things roll off our backs and be satisfied with what we need rather than dwell on the things we want.  Have a little more faith in our fellow man.  Try some kindness and treat people the way we would want to be treated.   

This old world can be like a used car salesman telling you this and selling you that to the point that we are never happy with having just what we need.

  Ultimately, walking is safer and better for you.

peace.

It’s a “guy” thing

July 10, 2010

I have yet another pet peeve.  Is it possible to have too many?  I don’t think so.  Case in point, dining out…

I took my beautiful girl out for dinner last night to a nice restaurant. Not quite formal dining but right up there.  Clean jeans, vintage T-shirt, I even shaved the night before.  Anyway, we arrive early to beat the crowds and BB asks for a booth (for our cozy rendezvous) and after a slight delay, we were cheerfully assigned one.  The manager’s seating person steps up and directs us “guys” to where we will be enjoying the next 1.5 hours of the evening.  

It irritates me to be out with my wife and hear us being refered to as the “guys”.  If we were in a sports bar or attending a monster truck event at the local arena, I would concur we probably were just a couple of “guys” out having a good time.  But my sweetheart was looking fairly fab and being addressed as “guys” seemed to diminish that a little in my mind.  So after beckoning us to “swagger along behind” I said, “We guys would love to follow you.”  My always intuitive better half smiled and said, “There’s a new post for you!” and so here it is.

As stated previously on AMRFP (Let Me Call You Sweetheart,   01/06/07 )  I do not mind a little familiarity with my servers, but that is just me.  When it comes to dining out with my wife at a nice restaurant, I would like a little more proper decorum. 

So how does one distinguish between being or not being called “honey”, “babe”, “sweetheart” or “guys” when assisting patrons at an eatery?  Simple.  If there is sawdust on the floor, the people coming through your door are probably “guys”.

  If there is a television set anywhere within the public area for viewing, the cheers and jeers you are hearing probably are coming from the “guys”. 

If you serve pickled pigs feet, Slim Jims, chicken wings or Bar-B-Q ribs, the people wiping their mouths on their shirt sleeves are without a doubt “guys”.  If your all-night Diner is within 500 feet of a truck stop, chances are the people pluggin’ quarters into the jukebox are “guys”. 

You can call me “sweetheart” in front of my wife if you have the kahunas, but not if you are a “guy”.  That would be too awkward.  “Guys” should not call guys “babe”, “honey”, “dear” , “sweetheart”, “pumpkin” “swivel hips”, “daffodil” or “sweet cheeks”, it is just too weird sounding.

“Guys” do like formal dining.  “Guys” enjoy ordering from the wine list, having appetizers, eating 4 course meals and scarfing down deserts that are large enough to satisfy 3 normal sized persons.  We marvel at the simplicity of using our charge cards and confidently figure out 20% gratuities without the little “helper” guidelines (more for exceptional service, of course) and we won’t bat an eye when our bill exceeds a measly $100 for the two of us.  Nope.  It is a guy thing to be able to go out and mingle with society incognito without the astigmatism of being cast as “guys” when you clearly are not in your “guys” mode.

While I am out with my fair one, I may be a guy “out of water” (and I am proud to be an ordinary guy with aspirations…) but she is my lady.  Always.  In that respect, I should reach an elevated status simply by association.

It is a guy thing. 

The women we choose to associate with reflects our good taste.  They in turn should qualify us as “gentlemen” in certain instances. 

A respectful person providing a service should be mindful of that.

peace.


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.